Return with a Vengeance
And on top of ALL my complaints - things just have to worsen.
As they say, it never rains - it pours.
Guess who's back - a chip of the old block.
Remember that hated lizard which invaded my room and proceeded to lose its footing on the wall (under the influence of too mcuh insecticide) collapsed somewhere amidst my belongings in my room.
It's back - or more accurately speaking - it's offspring is back.
Spotted a smaller lizard scurrying across the wall of my bedroom(exactly where it's father/ mother had fallen). It is smaller - it has to be the next generation, which is back with a vengeance. Argkkk, how the hell do I get it out. See, you never know if you leave a trail of enemies chasing after you yelling for your blood.
Apparently, it's worse with lizards.
Accursed Planner
I've been struck with a curse - whatever that I try to plan, or even REMOTELY want to plan has always fallen apart - be it a trip to bintan, taiwan, bkk, kl, kukup or wherever that is beyond the shores of Singapore, have all succumbed to this curse. Am I doomed to remain this way forever? That I shall never, and can never leave the shores and go off on a holiday, NO matter how short, or near?
It always happens this way - one day, the idea just pops up and we get so excited about the whole idea and i scurry around trying to find information and deals and how much it would cost and what dates are ok. And the next day - hey - sorry, I can't go, or something, or whatever and the trip is off. It is extremely nerve-wrecking, especially when these are the 2 months that I can get away to anywhere I want, and I can't. (Don't tell me that I can go on a trip alone - my parents will fume like mad - and there is nothing nice about travelling alone - you are a perfect target for a mugger, and people in your tour will just wonder - what the hell is wrong with her).
Argkkkk!! It is so infuriating. Fine, mebe now is the bad season, we don't have enough time to plan, etc etc etc. But when even a plan to watch a movie at Jurong Point falls apart less than 12 hours after the idea had been pitched - I knew it, I have been cursed!! And now, the movie is not even postponed - it has been cancelled - OFFICIALLY!
Sucks big time.
You know what? I don't give a damn anymore - to hell with planning.
(keeping fingers crossed that hopefully, this reverse psychology thing will work)
And while I am unable to visit the shores of anywhere else but Singapore, and being 'heart-broken' time and again by such sorry twists and turns of fate. I have decided that the only thing trusty to me are still my books. I can just jump into bed with one from Gerald Durrell and be transported immediately to the Greek island of Corfu where flora and fauna are bountiful, where no one has to work or worry about bills, prospects or anything even slightly unhappy. I can choose to re-read the particular paragraph that caught my attention and pay more attention to it and choose to soak up the sunshine on the sun-kissed beaches of Corfu.
Either that, or be flung into the fictional world of the Belgariad and join Garion, Polgara and Belgarath on their pursuit of the Orb, to see armies mobilising, chuckle at the snide remarks thrown in the direction of Barak or Silk. Or, (my latest acquisition), join the 2 children in the adventures of the Wishing Chair and visit the Land of Goodies and be treated to chocolate ice-cream cones that grow on trees, or drink lemonade from a bubbling stream.
Or the harsh reality so obviously points out - I need a life :(
In the Pits of Hell...
Augkkk, I am feeling so freaking crappy - thanks to some viruses or whatever (that have both managed to plague ME and my darlin' laptop, with whom I share a roller-coaster love-hate relationship with). Yeah, I am sick.
Phlegm - Chrorophyll green (yeah, it's THAT shade of a green - you know, the substance that gives veggies their colour). I mean, I live my vegs and all, but to see that on some mucus that I had to cough so hard to get out of my throat was, in every sense of the word, REALLY DISGUSTING.
And now, there is this pounding headache that just refuses to go away. And it's freaking, whatever symptoms I am experiencing now has been asked by this Chinese physician (whom I consulted on Friday - cos I could hardly breathe properly). Woah, power man, and all that just for feeling for my pulse. Freakingly amazing. Could even predict the symptoms before they hit me full-force. Hmm, the screaming and cheering, wedding chocs and rambutans MUST have done me in.
Worse, I am freaking starving. The only thing(s) I have had since morning: -
1. Tons and tons of chrysanthemum tea (which I had hoped could provide a miraculous cure, but somehow my hopes were misplaced)
2. A corn bun
3. 1/2 a stalk of broccoli (yup, one broccoli is the serving that your mum cooks for dinner for the WHOLE family.)
In my family, we eat veggies like...erm, rabbits? nay, rabbits eat hay...I dunno.
Broccoli is probably much too expensive to feed in bulk to animals/ veggie-eating pets.
And my stomach is growling now... well, and I cannot really move cos I am
(a) sick to the stomach that the phlegm I coughed out is a revolting shade of green.
(b) Any sudden movement to me threatens to make me lapse into a coughing fit that is bound to produce the above (provided that I cough hard enough - to spew my entrails out of my nose)
(c) There is nothing really delicious to eat - well, there are all the stuff my mum brought back from M'sia yesterday - Portugese eggtarts and chicken pies - but to eat those in my 'delicate' condition is tantamount to committing suicide.
[much as I detest myself at times and think about suicide almost every other week - erm, I'd like to die a prettier version, not some pale-faced gal with my facial features totally contorted in an attempt to cough out the phlegm, which incidentally choked me to death.]
(d) I am plain lazy...
With all these taken into account, one should be glad should I ever live to blog another day... (not another time) Who knows, I might just describe in gory detail the efforts needed to expel that phlegm and the slow torturous process I'd have to go through...
Croak...ahem...Croak
Gawd, I am almost wishing that I am a frog now, so at least I'd look like what I sound.
I thought that being unable to breathe properly through the nose is bad, but being unable to breathe properly through the nose AND unable to speak cos one's throat is THAT sore & inflammed is definitely a million, billion, zillion times WORSE.
And somehow, someone up there had the humour to make ME the victim of such an 'interesting' & definitely very inconvenient and painful situation. Sighz... Well, my current state also probably has to do with the fact that my JC class congregated at one of our classmate's wedding dinner. And that - being our 'virgin' wedding dinner - of someone in our class - we were escstatic and delirious - with many ways to embarrass ourselves...haha (which, we unfortunately, accomplished without much hassle).
We were even the centre of attention - when all of us did a yam seng with the couple at our table. Erm, the fact that all of us, gers & guys, were screaming our throats off, yelling ourselves hoarse, super loud - was a no brainer to get all the unwanted attention we did from the rest of the guests. [Call it the training from our days at HC - anywhere, anything was an occasion to cheer - even the most demure-looking ger there could do a decent cheer]. So, we had the dubious honour of being the loudest and most notorious table of guests among all the rest - despite the fact that we boasted only 9 people. Can you believe it? As long as our class is together, all the brain cells just magically pulverize into goo and we all turn into loud-talking, stupid-joke-spouting, delirious goofs - yours truly included.
Anyway, all that shouting, laughing, together with the good (& very HEATY) food, talking loudly probably did more than their fair share of contributing to my being in my current state now. And the chocolates were GOOD - I shared mine with my mum when I came home - the white round one with coffee-flavoured praline filling in the centre...Uhmm, yummy. Eh, all that food, and having eaten quite a lot of rambutans (very heaty fruits), oranges (definitely NOT good for a throat that was already quite sore) probably did me in.
Sighz... so here I am, upon waking up and finding that I can only manage the merest croak, which is barely audible even to myself. And the situation does not seem to have improved any bit till now, when I have already been up for some time. So the only way to 'express' myself & communicate is to type - & blog. But these days will end too, when the Dell pple come and collect this slightly malfunctioning laptop for more scrutiny and hopefully, total thorough inspection and repair tmrw.
And then, I shall truely be 'voiceless'. Probably have to carry a clipboard and pen around - which, was incidentally what I did when I really lost my voice in Uni in year 3. Deja vu... (just that it is somewhat, not a much to be envied position).
Wedding Bells...
Just came back from a wedding dinner of a JC classmate - Woah, realisation hits home - people around me certainly are getting married, gotten a total of 5 red bombs so far (including one more in december) and this is the first time that the significant person (bride/ groom) is closer to our group - Hey, C12 man, dun play play.... and btw, CONGRATS WOL!
Well, what that meant actually was just the licence to make tons of noise, fools of ourselves and totally embarrass everyone in the restaurant... Really, we didn't restrain ourselves and our merry making one tiny bit. As it was a small quiet affair, we contributed 1% each to the attendance and definitely much more in noise pollution. I am sure the bride and groom were shaking their heads off in worry judging from the cacophony that we were making.
But it was FUN, really fun. We started digging up stuff that happened during JC days - people remembered stuff about me that I myself did not even have the slightest recollection of. Laughed our heads off at how we treated teachers who were bullied by us, how we detested those who kepy scolding and condemning us (yeah, we were THAT notorious in school).
Hehe, so fun - a wedding dinner of a closer friend - no wonder pple get drunk and do so much noisy merry making during such occasions. Hmmm, totally looking forward to the next one in our class - but have already been warned that we'd probably have to wait ages... :) But the best things in life are definitely worth waiting for...
Trying to Make Sense of Insensibility
Couldn't touch my laptop for days (adopting the ostrich mentality that as long as I don't see it, it doesn't exist) - hoping that whatever trouble I have had with it was all part of my over-active imagination - courtesy of a lethal combination of a lack of sleep and a constant intake of alcohol.
And hey presto, it seems to work - well, at least I am keeping my fingers crossed that it will. Was updated by Degussa that pirated CD shops are a thing of the past (and here I was, thinking that they would still be housed in Sim Lim Square) - I am THAT out of touch! So, was totally prepared to PAY for the subscription to Norton Antivirus (mine expired this April). And guess what, I am unable to do liveupdate - because I am using Windows XP - so apparently this is MS' fault - and after being directed left and right, I have to dl some Service Pack 2. But I recalled friends' negative comments about it - apparently, one could not even use his printer after installing it. ARgkkk, see lah, wanna willingly pay money also cannot!
In my opinion, why don't these big shots just be pals and good frens with each other - so that they can churn out some thing that is at least COMPATIBLE with whatever the rest of the world is using. Petty idiots! Can't someone just knock some sense into them.
Well, I know some of you will be yelling and screaming "Hey, what the hell do YOU know about programming? Who the hell do you think you are to criticise?" Hey, I'd admit it - I am a PC idiot, which gives me the liberty to complain like hell about that, since i have ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA what on earth is involved. That's the advantage of owning a blog, don't ya think?
Cyberphobia
Not just house lizards, I have this unexplainable fear of computers also.
Well, specifically speaking, this fear is of computers that suddenly don't work, give problems, can't function properly, etc.
I'll be the first to admit that I am a PC idiot and such situations totally render me helpless.
And now is such a situation. My blardy laptop has deserted me...and I have NO idea why.
I hate such situations....ARGKKK
Freaking Blardy Lizard
Argkkk, just when I thought help has arrived - in the form of my father.
Well, not exactly the best form of help - cos he is afraid of lizards himself. Let's just say that my certain particular behaviour towards house lizards is conditioned (& genetically pre-disposed) by him. After much screaming to him to get the insecticide, he finally came into the room. Just when I was trying to get my bag of junk food and goodies (out of the insecticide and out of the lizard's range - he started spraying that foul-smelling thing, even BEFORE my junk food was out of the way).
And that blardy stupid lizard had the WORST sense to come scrambling nearer to me instead. *Scream, scream, shriek shriek.* Just when I thought nothing could be worse - it faltered on the wall, lost grip of the surface and came tumbling down - and landed - I dunno where. It had chosen to drop among my boxes of stuff and books! ARgk, just when there was a clear landing so that we could make a killing - literally - 10 cm away.
U'd think my dad would finish the job, no...to him, he cannot see the lizard (just pull the freaking boxes away - there are only 4 boxes) and hence, cannot hunt it down. After much hysterical shrieking on my part - he half-heartedly tugged at some boxes and declared - "Aiyah, dunno where it has gone - there is no where it can run to!" Of cos lah, it is still blardy stuck in my room (WITH ME IN IT STILL). I just hope that creature can run somewhere else and die. And not let me find it 2 months later - its corpse. Or worse, recuperate and return to haunt me! HELP!!!
So now I have a dead - or semi-comatose lizard in my room! (which, btw, is still reeking of poisonouse insecticide fumes) Oh goodness, pls just get the freaking out of my room. I just thoroughly cleaned it and I certainly DO NOT need a half dying lizard/ half recuperating one to add to its aesthetic beauty....
Help - I need the pest busters!!!
Argk, I have a lizard above my door
I hate lizards, no, I fear them more.
I can squash roaches with utmost accuracy and swiftness.
I don't really cringe that much at rats.
Snakes are nice (leather material).
I don't scream whenever a chameleon or tree lizard dashes across my path.
But I just view HOUSE lizards with hatred, disgust and most of all - fear!
One would think - house lizards only what... they are pest destroyers - eat flies, insects, etc.
Yadah, yadah, yadah - whatever you say - I am freaking scared of these creatures.
And man, they just like to plague me - or is it some kinda self-fulfilling prophecy?
Yikes, and now I've gotten one above the door frame of my room. Great, now I am imprisioned here. Argkk, shooting rubber bands, loud knocking sounds on the door do not faze that cold blooded creature. Took my eye off it for a sec and it has moved INTO my room - that is OFFICIALLY an INVASION! ARgkkk, HELP!!
There are NO rubber bands anywhere near me, no insecticide within reach and all my family members are asleep.. I do not, (I repeat), I do NOT want to share my room with the stupid freaking lizard!! But there is nothing I can do, I cannot scare it off - I am afraid that any sudden loud noises will propel it to make a dash for somewhere NEARER me, or my belongings..EWWW.
Argkkk, hateful lizards - HELP, anyone...give me a dozen roaches anytime....
how how how how how how how how how???? Help....
Blogger's Block
This blog was supposed to be my graffiti board - you know, where I get to defame people, criticise them, complain like mad about such irritating imbeciles and constantly whine about life and work. But realised that I have been blogging to entertain recently... Oh my, what about my endless stream of complaints and whines? Where have they gone?
Hence, to remain true to myself, or my blog, more accurately speaking, I shall endeavour to use this blog for the main purpose for which it was created for - for me to whine, complain, criticise non-stop about stupid incidents, hateful people, friends-turned-acquaintances. Thus, no more of interesting anecdotes, crappy stories for now - have thus decided to sink into blogger's block...
So there! You've been forewarned.
In An Ape's Shoes... or hands, rather
In the name of research, I have decided to make the ultimate sacrifice for humankind in order to further the society's knowledge of how our close relatives - primates behave and function.
Hence, I decided that I would curve my arms in order for my palm to reach any part of my face, rather than bend it at the elbow. If you had not known, that is the way apes move - their upper limbs, that is. I wanted to find out how it felt and whether it made things easier.
Fine, fine.... I was stuck with no choice. Had to move like that because after pulling my leg muscle just about a week earlier, (blessed with utmost intelligence coupled with the amazing lack of good sense - I went to the gym again) and this time, cleverly managed to pull my arm muscles - those in the triceps(?)
Actually, a few days earlier, I successfully introduced the meaning of pain to my 'biceps' (in inverted commas cos they don't really exist - just that in theory, they are supposed to be there...but somehow I only see layers of fat and flab). Hence, even without doing anything, they hurt like mad and were definitely sore. After days of complaining and being rebuffed by my sis (a gym rat) who coldly commented - "Complain also no use, what you want me to do?", I decided to keep the pain to myself.
However, this time, I didn't expect things to go that far. I can NOT bend my elbows that much, which means that I have to bear with the irritating itch that always hits you whenever you can never reach that particular part of one's anatomy. And besides that, I can barely hold my arm straight...argkkk. Thus, feeding becomes an almost too painful to bear experience - go on, try to curve your arm in order to make your hand reach your face - try it and tell me if you feel good.
Poor apes...
Anti Homo Sapiens
I hate people, I hate human beings, I can't tolerate the way they behave, I detest the way they think and I despise the way they plot and scheme against one another.
Most of all, I loathe myself. I am part of that stinking blardy species too, stuck in such a freaking screwed up society.
If only I can turn homicidal and exterminate all of them like the varmint they all are, and then unleash the suicidal streak in me.
Then the world will be rid of almost all the problems. There will be no wars, no poverty, no disparity in income, no one will be starving, hungry, cold and dirty or dying.
People tell me I am full of angst. It's not just angst - it's despise, loathing, anger, malice, suspicion, fear, or whatever freaking crap that is.
I reiterate - I hate human beings.
Narcissism at it's best... (upon 2nd thought, make it 2nd best)
Have been blogging SO MUCH these days - not entirely due to the fact that I am happily bumming at home with absolutely NOTHING to do. There are tons of things to do - just that I am too lazy to do them. In case you haven't noticed - I am well know for being a procrastinator too.
Anyway, I must have fallen in love (too much, in fact) with how my words sound - that I did the impossible. Well, theoretically speaking - it is actually do-able. Just that usually people are not that much in love with themselves that they actually commit it and ADMIT to the whole world.
Yes, I did it and I am NOT afraid to admit that (despite there will probably be mobs crying for my blood) - I RE-READ my whole blog from the first entry to the last. There! I said it... and somehow, although it has been widely acclaimed that admission to a problem is the first step to recovery (of my sanity, I suppose), I do not seem to feel much better. *ponders*
From the very first word - where I set my disclaimer, to my very latest entry. Woah... and that was HOW I realised that I have been blogging non-stop this whole week. (Not that this entry about confession and self-realisation that I have this problem is gonna make things any better). And guess what? I liked my entries - I liked the way the words sound, the play of words to create puns and above all, I liked the titles (to most entries, that is). Reveling in my entries - the words just seem like musically perfect (like a great score).
With that, I have to proclaim, this act is narcissism at it's best. Erm, I guess not, I think the ger whose blog "everyone is reading" is the epitome of narcissism, so I suppose I'll have to settle for 2nd best.
Re: A Melting Pot - A Tribute to My JC Classmates
Sent an email to my JC classmates (or at least those in our mailing list) with that particular blog entry. And forewarned them that this entry was NOT meant to offend, but to entertain instead...and here are some reactions to that!
For those who didn't respond, I can only keep my fingers crossed that they are not seething with anger and sharpening their knives to punish me for portraying them in a less than glamourous light - please have mercy!!
Here's one: -
Heya, *moi* (names have been changed to protect yours truly), your tribute really moves me to saliva.... i was salivating at every word u have written and drooling at every suspectingly-familiar connotations and references you have made. But in all, it was written so well that it has encapsulated the essence of each and everyone of us, all-emcompassing yet detailedly fascinating. I am reading it now at 1:20am, after teetering on the brink of madness that is the copious articles on my desk now. And you have succeeded in your primary ambition - to entertain. But far more, you have touched my heart and soul at this unearthly hour. And brought to me memories which I have tucked to the back of my head. I have posted it without your permission on my blog for posterity sake. Good things should be shared. so Thank you for the wonderful tribute...
Time must be unlimited in your hands. now chop it off and give it to me! hahaha.....^___^
And this is two: -
Hey....=) What a nice email to read first thing in the office - indeed anice change fr the arrow shooting/work emails! So thanks for making my Monday less blue =) !!But *moi* (names have been changed to protect yours truly), you really bring out the essence of *our class* and this wacky bunch of us well.
Very touching yet witty at the same time....:) Whatever recountedby you is really true, esp all our spastic jokes, suanning, laughs we always are not short of, whenever we meet....and of coz the inevitable phototaking/counting of $$ at the end of every meal ;p
Hmm..next time I would bring the class diary/book and we can have a good laugh reminscing abt the glorious time in *our JC*, ok!
Sorry, Butt...
Sometimes, I wonder why I even allow myself to be landed into such a predicament. And it hurts even more that I supposedly had control over the situation; I could have said no, and prevented it from happening in the first place ... why did I not?
Well, apparently the bout of panting and shortness of breath after scaling a pathetic 4 flight of stairs was plainly shrieking that:
1. I am getting old
2. I AM old
3. I seriously need to do something about my state of health (or rather, the lack of it)
And that meant that I had to get serious! I have had been a fan of the gym (goodness knows how long that has been - I think that was about 2-3 years ago?) And after starting work, somehow the word exercise seemed to have lost its appeal. Gone were the days when I'd miss getting my butt off the floor and walk around abit. Somehow, the TV had never seemed so attractive (there was no need to even have good shows, anything was definitely better than trying to get my blood pumping).
Not that my family has not been trying - I gotta give them credit. My mum has been nagging me to go down early in the morning to jog 2 rounds around the estate, telling me all the time how good the morning fresh air is for us. Erm - yeah right, take into account all the poisonous fumes the trucks, buses and cars are putting into that and you've got a potent mixture capable of killing more than just rats. Hey, I reasoned - since I am gonna die sooner either due to an unhealthy lifestyle, or air poisoning from those fumes - why torture myself in the process?
But the extremely painful game of badminton last weekend told me that I was just kidding myself. I ached in places I didn't even know muscles, or tendons or whatever existed. In short - it was a reality jolt. So, armed with a sense of determination (that could only come about with a remarkable lack of intelligence) - I decided to get my sorry butt off the floor and grimly set foot into a gym. Sometimes, I wished that I had been blessed with even less intelligence, so that at least I would have forgotten how to get to the gym, and in the process, save myself from pain and agony. Unfortunately, this cruel joke had to be played - and I was the willing, but extremely dim-witted victim.
The place was not one of those fancy, posh, high-tech ones in town (the travelling time alone will probably exceed my whole time there - work out and rest times included) and that is a sure combination to get myself totally disinterested. It was a neighbourhood one - not that near, still had to take a bus and walk about 15 minutes to get to it. And you'd think that the place will be rather empty on a weekday mid morning.
Boy, was I further from the truth. To be exact, the gym denizens didn't start coming in till 11 plus, but there were more than enough to make my rattled. Truth be told, I have totally forgotten how to use few machines that I had used before. And having age catch up with me (together with the total lack of stamina and gym poise), I was a gym disaster just waiting to happen.
But then again, I was already there... so it was kinda hard to step out again. That single hour was hard - I probably rested longer than I was at the machines. And at the end of it, it felt like eternity. Deciding that one hour of torture was more than enough for the day (and the rest of my life), I stopped and made my way home - happily thinking that the pain was over. I had never been more wrong - the aches I had felt at the gym did not disappear long after I was home. And there MUST have been something that I didn't do correctly, for every step I took was one of extreme agony. Sitting down itself become a huge effort that was inevitably accompanied by groans of pain. Yeah, my sorry butt...had now evolved into a sorry body, full of aching joints and muscles.
And guess what? I was masochistic enough to go again the next day, not to mention, engage in a game of badminton the day after that... so now the single pulled muscle has got a companion - I've got 2 blardy pulled muscles in BOTH my legs, and my walking gait is embarrassingly pathetic. And it all started from a sorry butt...
A Melting Pot - A Tribute to My JC Classmates
A Melting Pot - that's the exact phrase I used to describe my JC class in our own annual year book (back then). It was the 'norm' to have class diaries but I do believe that we carried it to extremes - we drew graves of detested teachers and the most ridiculous diseases they succumbed to - mole cancer, for one...
So many years down the road, and we are still one pretty tight knit group - selective members, that is. Of course there are those who never appear, but for the rest of us, we are comfortable enough with the rest of the group that we always have class outings! At our age, somemore. Not that I am discriminating against older people- but this affair has been something that I truly look forward to everytime. We have class outings about once a month or every two months - and for a group of 5-10 to meet each time is no mean feat. We work in different industries, with offices in different areas, live in different districts and yet, still make the effort to turn up at each class outing. That itself, says alot about us and our 'regular' gatherings...
And it is always fun, full of laughter, stupid crappy jokes, anecdotes and hilarious incidents that we'd recall which happened eons ago - how the virtually the whole class had sneaked out in the middle of school to go to Macs for breakfast, got caught by our teacher and did CS together. Come to think of it, that punishment also seemed like a class gathering!
Sad to say, we are not the most becoming people when lumped together in a group. Despite the fact that my JC class was mostly female-dominated (in terms of both numbers and intellectual wit), we nevertheless degenerated into a boisterous rowdy lot who is forever cackling and hooting uncontrollably in cafes, restaurants and wherever we had chosen to celebrate. Upon retrospect, I do feel a tinge of pity and apology towards our fellow diners who had unwittingly chosen the right place at the wrong time - when we have a class gathering. It is thus with much embarrassment that I now recall how they always cast those withering glances at us, with that "totally CMI - cannot make it" condescending looks we always get, but somehow never seeming to understand in such situations.
One almost always have to be there to understand what I am talking about. Huddled together like conspirators discussing the details of a revolt, dirty jokes would surface, crappy anecdotes retold and we would suddenly burst out into uncontrollable bouts of hysterical laughter - much to the disgust of the restaurant managers and the poor souls within earshot.
A typical scene of our class gathering begins like this - a few more punctual ones appear at the place right on the dot, whereas the rest (unfortunately - that accounts for the majority) slowly drift in in pairs while the latest one (who is often - not out in the work force yet) arrives a good 30 - 45 minutes later. By then, those who are still tied up in the office (literally speaking) would have either messaged or called to send their apologies...while the party starts.
Twittering incessantly, we'd catch up with one another over the latest news, what we have done, encountered, or bought, expressed anguish and/ or disgust (or sometimes a mixture of both at the same time) for at least an hour. And all this is done on the pretext of consulting the menu. When a hungrier member asks if we have decided, we then studiously scrutinize the menu - (for me, sometimes I do wish they have set dinners - or a change in the food - it sure would make things easier). After about 20 minutes of agonizing over what to eat - we'd invariably settle on the usual - fish and chips, chicken, salmon fillet and pizza (yeah, we grew up with junk food, or at least I did).
Soon (actually, it's usually a long wait, but peppered with questions and answers to one another, time does seem to pass by more easily, and) the food will arrive. Amidst tucking heartily into our own food, we'd ALWAYS exchange food, cut a slice of this and that and dump it into another's plate, reach over (politely) and spear a piece of that delectable piece of meat (upon being asked to). And we'd share drinks and desserts TOO! haha, you'd think, with several professionals among us, and most of us working adults in relatively good jobs (with the exception of yours truly, who is still unemployed), we'd be more than happy to fork out money on drinks and desserts without a second thought. Perhaps it's due to the fact that there are more gals than guys, we always end up sharing desserts and drinks - either to share the guilt factor, or just cos it's become "us" to do that. Heaven forbid that we ever do that in a pub/club/ lounge - but the truth is, when numbers prevail - well, our skins invariably grower to be thicker than a rhino's hide.
Long after finishing our food, we'll languish contentedly at the premises, crack stupid jokes (again, unfortunately), mock each other and the lack of good sense and intellectual ability (good-naturedly, of course) and express mock anger and disgust at each other's acquisitions and decisions. "What? You spent $AAA on this? It's so expensive! Wah, why not spend the money on me? Okies lah, today you shall foot the bill - thanks in advance ar?"
More often than not, our laughter and jokes (not in such good taste, i am afraid), fueled by the intake of good food and more importantly, good company - will become so loud that we are greeted with frosty stares again. Blissfully oblivious to the blatantly murderous glares of fellow diners, we oohed and aahed over seemingly senseless encounters retold, complained about our jobs and nasty people we'd met and burst out into fits of giggles again at regular intervals. Interspersed with this will be several bouts of photo-taking with our digital cameras, handphones as we struck poses, stuck fingers behind each others' heads and beamed away, while other cheekier members take candid shoots (apparently for blackmailing purposes - should anyone of us become rich and famous in the distant future).
Soon, the night would beckon again (more strongly this time) and we'd realise how late it is, hurry each other to leave (so that we'd be in time to catch the tv serial) and ask for the bill. Wallets will then be pulled out, calculators in handphones and PDAs utilised to calculate the individual bill - dollar notes gathered in a pile while one pays first. Upon getting the receipt, we'd take turns to scrutinise it and then recall the waitress again to ask why we were being wrongly billed, or why they did not extend to us the discount. (This seems to be a disturbing trend at the restaurant we are now currently faithfully patronising -although I do feel that sometimes the owner would be happier not to see us at all - as our arrival always spells 'unrest', hoots of uncivilised laughter and a bringing about a general detriment to the sanity of his other more profitable customers).
One good thing about my JC classmates is that no matter what we are doing - be it clubbing in a trendy place, eating in a nice restaurant/ cafe, or cutting a common birthday cake in MacDonald's - we have always enjoyed each other's company and thoroughly had uninhibited fun (in an asexual way, for goodness' sake!!!). We are comfortable in our own skins in one another's presence and there is no need to hide behind invisible walls or barriers, no need to portray a 'better' image to anyone. We've known each other for 7 years - not exactly a short period of time and it's good to know that there will always be this bunch of friends there - with whom you can share hilarious tales and embarrassing incidents and laugh like a group of hyenas - a group of very happy hyenas indeed.
So here it is, a tribute to my JC classmates - who choose not to judge, but to accept me for what I stoicly insisted that I am, whose presence and friendship have brought me much joy and laughter. From the depths of my heart, I sincerely thank you.
White Canes or Shades, any one?
Haven't managed to gain access to my laptop for eons - and it's probably choking under so many layers of dust....finally managed to unearth it from the whole labry of mess. Goodness, there are just so many things that crossed my mind which I want to muse about... Decided that it will probably be easier if I just categorised them according to their genres?
Was tutoring my kid in preparation for her final year exams and it was the final lesson (at least for the school year). Had to instruct her to read her science text book so that she can have the faintest idea of the various methods that fruits and plants reproduce.
At an impressionable age of 11, she has already figured out that there are inherent biological differences between male and female specimens of the homo sapiens. Sex education, or more accurately - the biological names of human beings' reproductive sexual organs are also part of the science syllabus. However, one still cannot shy away from the fact that in a rather conservative Asian society, many still treat this subject as taboo.
Which is why whenever we flip to the section on human reproduction, there is an inevitable shrill shriek, followed by "eeeewww" - the undisguised disgust so apparent in her voice. And this will invariably follow " I CAN'T believe that our teacher made us draw the sexual organs...."
But that day was definitely unforgettable. We were looking at a picture of several sperms 'swimming' towards the single egg and this question popped up "Do the sperms have eyes? I can't see them at all!" Being a product of the ancient education system - designed & structured in the 80's & 90's - my education certainly did not cover this aspect and I was definitely NOT prepared for such a question. I could only say "Erm, I am not really sure, but we can't really see any eyes here..."
"Then how do they know where to swim to? They could swim all over the body and not towards the egg!" - was the indignant reply to my ignorance. *Silence ensued*
I was on the verge of wanting to explain to her why there was only one place where the sperm could be, but realised that it was going to be even harder trying to extract myself from that particular situation so I had to suppress my laughter and give a vague "erm, dunno leh..."
Oh man, somehow this narration of the whole situation just does not do the scenario enough justice. Trust me, it is so freaking funny!
Hence, just out of curiosity - if the sperms didn't have eyes - or the use of sight, would they need white canes or shades to indicate that, so other kindly 'cells' could helpfully direct them to the correct place?
